Sunday, March 30, 2008

Sunday MopUp 03/30/08

As I sit here, Texas is getting the snot beat out of them in the NCAA tournament. I've got a date tonight, and I'm playing Susie Hairy Homemaker while I throw together a post and call it my Sunday MopUp. Feel free to dust while you read.

The Date with Sexual Chocolate. I love this guy, but I've been keeping him at arm's length as of late. And he has called me on it. I was supposed to see him last night, and I cancelled on him. It hasn't been the first time. He reminded me that what I was doing was "lame". I've gotta agree. I think we'll see a movie tonight, I'd like to see "21". Not much else out there, movie-wise.

I KNOW what my hesitancy is about, by the way. This is about my realization that being a bottom doesn't really work for me. And SC is a hardcore top. I'm afraid that if I turn him down, I'll lose a friend. I've been losing friends lately, and it doesn't make me feel good. Ya know?

Oh, remember the hot sex I had with the guy who turned out to be a powerbottom? Not a word from him. Nothing. Nada. Zero. Zilch.

[heavy sigh]

Called My Mother

this weekend. She kept me on the phone for two solid hours, and I don't think I got a word in edgewise. She's lonely. It's still freezing in Michigan. She has been depressed lately. So, I let her talk. And talk. I hope it helped. My ear is still sore.

The Antique Mantle Clock

My older sister, Rebel, was a collector. She spent weekends searching for shit at local flea markets, and was quite good at spotting, and buying, neat stuff. Stuff I would never spend a penny on, by the way.

Well, when I moved into this townhouse 8 years ago, she gave me a mantle clock. I dont have a mantle to put it on, but that didn't matter. It is a wind-up chime time piece and it is an antique. Along with the clock came they key that you use to wind it. Rebecca made it a point to tell me not to lose the key.

I lost it within a month.

I never told her this, and she would ask me on the phone, now and then, if I still enjoyed the clock. I assured her that I did, although all it was doing was sitting silently on my china buffet in the livingroom. It hasn't ticked, let alone chimed, in years and years.

And now my older sister is gone.

Well, I recently found the key, stuffed at the back of a drawer in my rolltop desk. I wound the clock back up, and it is ticking and chiming right along now. And, with every BONG I hear in the middle of the night, I think of my sister. I think she'd be pleased that the clock is functioning again.

I miss her. That clock is very important to me now.

Ummm...I'm gonna go now. I appreciate that you looked in on me. Hope you are well.


Dick Small said...

Sometimes I just let the phone ring until the answering machine picks up the call. If it's mom sometimes I just let her leave a message, and don't pick it up. She'll call a few days later and tell me she left a message. I'll tell her "I know. I was out all day and didn't get home 'til late".
I'm a rotten son.

Ice John's World said...

It is nice that you were a good listener to your mom. And it is great that you keep that clock your sister gave to you. You are a nice person, Jim.

Dick Small said...

Well, I still say sometimes it's better to let mom vent on my answering machine, than have to listen to it in person. I find myself saying:
"Yes. Right. Uh-huh. Sure. Really? Wow. Yup. Right. hmmm. Sure. Yup. No, I didn't know that. Uh-huh. Yeah. Sure. Nope. So how is so-and-so???? Yes. Wow. Really? Uh-huh. Sure. No. Yeah..."....

Mel said...

I have to talk to mom every other day and its the same like you said..listen for hours. My mom is very lonely.

Hope things work out well on your date, I dont want you to lose a friend!!

I bet that clock is special now. so cool you found the key

cyber mistress said...

call the powerbottom guy, ask what'sup. you're just being friendly... yeah, it's really good to keep friends, and losing 'em...yeah, i know how it feels

Allen said...

Hey Jimmy, As I was reading your last few bloggers, I notice something about how you write and the way you open your heart up to the readers. Even if these openings are small, they are large enough for us to see a part of your soul. You may not feel too good about that fact but you should. In a world where very few say what they mean or mean what they is great to know some people (like you) still feel and speak what is real and full of meaning. You may not see that in yourself and I am sure most people do not see th human side of themselves but it is there. You spoke about losing friends...sometimes this is something that is simply apart of life. Like the pain of loss or the breakup of a relationship. I am sure these events that happen to us are apart of helping us become better human beings. No life can be embraced or understood without pain as well as joy. The clock and the key are two reminders left behind by your sister to let you know...You are the Key to Joy and to those who know you best.
Talk to you later Jimmy.
Take care dude.