Monday, October 23, 2006



Let's Talk About Oral Hygiene


Okay, I admit, I'm a freak about it. I don't care how hot and sexy you think you are, if your teeth have crud, I'm not getting in your face. Teeth, breath, lips, and tongue are a major thing in my world. Good oral hygiene is an absolute must. I can't help it. If I were ever kissed by someone with a pierced tongue, I'm fairly certain I would throw up in their mouth. It's just a guess, but let's not find out, okay?

So like, for years, I've known about the new generation of electric toothbrushes. You know, the Sonicare and Oral B brushes. My ex had the Sonicare when we were together. It did an adequate job, I suppose. I had even tried it. But I had convinced myself that nothing automatic can replace good old elbow-grease. When I brush my teeth, I want to exert pressure and scrub those fuckers. I make a mess, I really do. I brush in the shower so that all the toothpaste shrapnel doesn't end up all over the mirror, the plumbing, the floor, etc. I was a dedicated manual brusher.

"Foo!" on those new-fangled contraptions, said I.

Maybe I should mention that it didn't help that those electric things cost around seventy bucks, american. Oh, hell no! Give me a three dollar jobbie and a tube of Crest and back the fuck up, cuz I've got some brushing to get to!

Well, shut me up! Oral B, by Braun, is now making a CHEAPER version of their expensive model. Twenty bucks. Saw one at my local groery store. Has the head that not ONLY spins around and around, but part of it saws back and forth at the same time. I approve of the work ethic there. It's called the "Vitality", and I'm telling you folks, this baby ROCKS! I called my dentist to speak with my hygienist to get her opinion. She heartily endorses the product! She says she sees no difference between the results she has seen from the expensive model compared to the Vitality, and this woman looks in A LOT of mouths! I've been working the hell out of mine for over a week now, and it is really holding up to my rigorous use. If you don't have one, or have been holding out because of the price of the things: wait no longer. Everyone should own one of these bad boys.

And, by the way, if Braun ever came out with an Anal B, I'd be the first in line.

-Thank you for shopping at jimmycity!

2 comments:

TheChubbyAvenger said...

I agree about oral hygiene. I like nice fresh breath as much of the time as I can. I have a phobia, about myself, of breath issues. It's due to a problem I have with my tonsils. I floss twice a day and I brush twice a day. I don't like going to bed with dirty wool-sweater-feeling teeth or questionable breath. I like that fresh, frosty minty thing after mouthwashing. I've always done the manual thing, too. I love a good brushing. Maybe I'll look for one of those less expensive toothbrushes as you have done. As for the Anal B...hmm.. I'd pay a dollar to see that, but, my question is, HOW are ya gonna floss it?! Don't get me started on the mouthwash aspect of it, either!!!

TheChubbyAvenger

Bigg said...

Anal B.
I have to sit and think about that one.
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Would it have attachments?
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Would you have an affiliated brand of ass paste?
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Would it have batteries? Or kick start?
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Now that I've thought about it, I've decided that I'd love to see the look on the patent clerk's face when you apply. I suggest really big, clear diagrams, complete with a clean, satisfied ass in the background...