An Open Letter To Sue Doe-Nim
What the FUCK? I can't read your blog because I have not been "invited"? Sue, baby, invite me, fer cryin' out loud! I LOVE you! This is so wrong. It's like you've stepped on my penis or something.
An Open Letter To Constant Winter
Dear Constant, or Dear Winter...or whatever,
WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON? Between you and Sue, I haven't felt this rejected by women since I admitted to being a knob-gobbler. Let me IN! Fix your shit or email me the secret code or something. I miss you.
yada yada yada
An Open Letter To Bigg
I love you buddy. I think about you a lot. Stay strong.