Thursday, August 23, 2007

I Live In A Suitcase

Since I've begun working out, I have found the need to lug my gym bag around with me, most anywhere I go. This is a major pain in the ass, yet absolutely essential. It holds all my crap. It's like hauling carry-on luggage with me where ever I go. The whole world has become one big-ass airport terminal, and I am merely the weary traveler, waiting for my next flight. Or something.

I used to laugh at dudes with fannypacks, computer cases, and manpurses. Everything I ever needed, I could stuff into a pants pocket (or, in the case of a bag of pot: my sock). Back when I was underage, all I ever toted around was a wallet containing no money, fake ID, real ID, and a never used condom.

Now? Let's take a look inside my bag, shall we?:

*fresh gym shorts
*extra pair of cargo shorts
*fresh gym shirt
*fresh socks
*fresh grundersnorts
*"jimsize"gym towel
*iPod w/headphones
*minoxydil (shut up)
*diabetes meds

also included:
*thumbdrive for my pc
*bills that still need paid
*gym ID
*plastic bag for the wet & dirty

cameo appearances by:
*my regular glasses
*my sunglasses
*the damned blackberry

shocked to discover:
*cheeseburger wrapper
*receipt from porn store
*tokens (see above)
*never used condom

So. What's in YOUR wallet?


Ice John's World said...

That's quite a list in your gym bag! Mine contains the change clothes and shoes, a pair of weightlifting gloves, a lifting belt, and traveling size of shampoo/soap.

g-man said...

Too funny!!! I haven't carried a condom in my wallet ever. I'm with ya on all the rest of it though.

Sue Doe-Nim said...


Rogaine? I use it to keep my eyebrows from disappearing, a little on a q-tip.